"Spare" memoir by the Duke of Sussex (2023)

[chelly]

I would venture to say that it's likely Catherine was doing everyone a favor. She was saving Meghan the bad press that would come along with messy, sloppy, ill-fitted and ill-made dresses, comparisons, etc. along with making sure her own daughter was impeccably turned out. That it also would have allowed the other five girls to also look impeccable was an added bonus. Sometimes it does benefit one to listen to others with more experience in situations even if we like to be the "do it my own way" kind of person in all instances.

Especially when after her wedding the only thing anyone talked about was her sister's behind. And those dresses weren't ill fitting. I wonder if Kate and Pippa wished they went with a different dress.

 

[soapstar]

She asked him to take his finger out of her face. I feel like this is an indicator of her discomfort.

You’re right, she could very well have felt uncomfortable with William pointing at her. In fact, it seems to have been an uncomfortable situation for all of them. From the Harry wrote it, it sounds like tempers were flaring on all sides.

 

[Mirabel]

I hope the press are done with the reports, today was way too overwhelming.
All in all, IMO those who are the losers in this circus are those who’ve thrown so many unnecessary information into the public domain.

I know, right?
I haven't had much respect for Harry for quite some time, but I never thought he'd sink this low!

Much of this stuff is cringe-worthy!

 

[Claire]

We still have 4 interviews over the weekend - so stock up at the bottle store. I think one is Live - that might be the most interesting. Comedians can sneak in insults.

 

[soapstar]

Here’s the DM article about the sit down between the Wales and the Sussexes.

He describes arriving at their Kensington Palace flat and said that Meghan’s mouth was open because of the décor, priceless art on the walls, books and furniture, saying ‘Wow’ repeatedly. Harry said that they had been thinking to themselves that their neighbouring flat had Ikea lamps and furniture ‘we'd recently bought on sale with Meg's credit card on sofa.com.’

They then sat down for a cup of tea and some biscuits where they asked after the Wales’ children, and they in turn they had asked about the Sussexes’ honeymoon.

But after that Meghan decided to raise the question of their relationship and tensions going back to when she started dating Harry, suggesting there had been crossed wires when Kate thought Meghan wanted to use her connections in the fashion industry, when in fact she already had her own.

Meghan suggested that these problems had been magnified by the wedding preparations and the discussions over bridesmaids dresses. Harry then claims that Kate became upset and demanded an apology from Meghan for offending her when she mentioned her hormones after giving birth and suggesting it had affected her memory. Meghan initially said she couldn’t remember but then added: “I remember: you had forgotten something and I said that it didn’t matter, that it was because of pregnancy. Because you just had a child. Because of the hormones’.
Harry said Kate then said back: ‘We are not close enough for you to talk about my hormones'.

Meghan then said she spoke to all her friends that way and then William weighed in, pointing at Meghan and saying it was rude and she was wrong to say it. Meghan then told him to stop pointing in her face.

The Duchess of Sussex is then The Duchess of Sussex is then said to have declared that she had not wanted to offend Kate. They all hugged and left, Harry said, because they thought it best to head home rather than row further.

 

[Royalist.in.NC]

IMO the couple will keep going, this has been the pattern from the very beginning, continual drip feeding to keep themselves relevant.
The unsaid threats about what they could reveal, via their 'friends'.
It smacks of frustration on his part that he is not getting what he wants so he is going down this road
I am not sure what they want from the family, maybe money, maybe the HIHO.
Each interview/ article/ programme drops a little titbit, not enough to cause a reaction from BP but it is obviously what they want.
There will be family secrets that Harry knows and BP do not want out in the public domain, he is letting them know he could and would reveal all, if he has not already done so in this book.
He is bound to talk about his mother, he has never stopped since he left the family.

It is the irony that he has harped on for years about stuff going out that shouldn't have and now he is the carrier of the tales. I do think he will regret this in the long run.

It is all so sad.

Yes, on the one hand he says he wants his father and brother back, then in the next breath he trashes them. How on earth does he think this will lead to a reconciliation? I’d say it sounds like his goal is more like revenge and burning down the RF.

 

[Muhler]

We still have 4 interviews over the weekend - so stock up at the bottle store. I think one is Live - that might be the most interesting. Comedians can sneak in insults.

Oh dear!

I have several fractures on my chin already, it has hit the floor so many times over the past couple of days!

I'll need major face surgery when the fourth interview has been published...

 

[sophie25]

Especially when after her wedding the only thing anyone talked about was her sister's behind. And those dresses weren't ill fitting. I wonder if Kate and Pippa wished they went with a different dress.

It always confused me that Pippa wore such a form fitting, slinky dress, it didn't chime at all with what Kate and the smaller bridesmaids wore. It was a nice dress but it looked like she'd stumbled into the wrong event. Anyway, I agree that Meghan and her bridesmaids dresses were a bit of a shambles. However, it WAS Meghan's wedding so all of the main decisions were hers to make no matter what Kate or the rest of us thought .Also it's not as though ill cut dresses and not wearing tights was a scandal it just wasn't a very pretty look. If Kate did make a tremendous fuss about not liking it then I'd have to say she was wrong as it wasn't her wedding and she should have quietly respected the bride's decisions. As I mentioned already, I thought that Pippa's dress was also a bad choice but that was up to Kate just as Meghan's choices were up to her.

 

[FigTree]

Here’s the DM article about the sit down between the Wales and the Sussexes.

None of that seems right. It seems such a tiny bit of the story.

 

[Muhler]

Here’s the DM article about the sit down between the Wales and the Sussexes.
Quote:
He describes arriving at their Kensington Palace flat and said that Meghan’s mouth was open because of the décor, priceless art on the walls, books and furniture, saying ‘Wow’ repeatedly. Harry said that they had been thinking to themselves that their neighbouring flat had Ikea lamps and furniture ‘we'd recently bought on sale with Meg's credit card on sofa.com.’

They then sat down for a cup of tea and some biscuits where they asked after the Wales’ children, and they in turn they had asked about the Sussexes’ honeymoon.

But after that Meghan decided to raise the question of their relationship and tensions going back to when she started dating Harry, suggesting there had been crossed wires when Kate thought Meghan wanted to use her connections in the fashion industry, when in fact she already had her own.

Meghan suggested that these problems had been magnified by the wedding preparations and the discussions over bridesmaids dresses. Harry then claims that Kate became upset and demanded an apology from Meghan for offending her when she mentioned her hormones after giving birth and suggesting it had affected her memory. Meghan initially said she couldn’t remember but then added: “I remember: you had forgotten something and I said that it didn’t matter, that it was because of pregnancy. Because you just had a child. Because of the hormones’.
Harry said Kate then said back: ‘We are not close enough for you to talk about my hormones'.

Meghan then said she spoke to all her friends that way and then William weighed in, pointing at Meghan and saying it was rude and she was wrong to say it. Meghan then told him to stop pointing in her face.

The Duchess of Sussex is then The Duchess of Sussex is then said to have declared that she had not wanted to offend Kate. They all hugged and left, Harry said, because they thought it best to head home rather than row further.

So they were envious and Meghan failed to read the atmosphere.
And Harry seems unable to to fathom that other men can be just as defensive of their wives as he can.

Ding-a-ling!
Captain Obvious has a statement: It's quite normal for newlyweds to start out by having a relatively modest IKEA home.
While people who have been married a number of years have had time to get some good furnitures and build up a style of their own - sometimes they even have a good taste.

 

[Sunnystar]

So...Catherine was doing Meghan a favor by arguing over the bridesmaids dresses? Again, once Catherine made her point, she should have realized that she needed to step away from an argument with the bride. It's just common courtesy to let the bride have her preferences respected on her wedding day.



I'm not a professional seamstress but I have made most of my own clothes for the past 15 years, and I found Meghan's dress to be gorgeous. I thought the BMs looked fine as well.

Well, I suppose we're just going to have to disagree, though I will state as someone who has made hundreds of formal dresses in the last 25 years, that it is far different to make clothes for oneself than to make them for others. Additionally, making a group of dresses that are all supposed to match for a bunch of differently sized youngsters is no easy task, but someone on the level of head of a major fashion house should have certainly been up to the task - and has the pattern drafting software and experienced seamstresses on hand to make sure those dresses are perfect with little need for alterations. Furthermore, as someone who has sewn primarily for teenagers and tweens, most fit issues occur due to a growth spurt - it is unfathomable to me that Charlotte's dress was so large that it swam on her as has been related in the excerpt.

Looking at the pictures from the wedding, there are some definite issues with the fit and the hems were certainly all over the place - some hit right below the knee, some were further down closer to shin/tea length. You can see it particularly clearly in the official photos, how the bodices don't fit the girls properly - the gaping at the neck is a HUGE telltale sign of poor dress construction - there are at least 3 of the 6 with this issue and 2 others look like they have an issue with the shoulder/hollow/armpit fit, and the 6th one looks like it was too big around the waist based on the way it's bubbling when she is standing up straight.

In all fairness, looking over the pics of the bridesmaids' dresses from Catherine, Eugenie, and Pippa Middleton's weddings, I have to say Meghan's bridesmaids dresses WERE significantly more ill-fitting than the others.

 

[soapstar]

None of that seems right. It seems such a tiny bit of the story.

It’s definitely not the whole story….we’re only hearing from one side. I imagine William and Kate have a different version on how events played out.

 

[Curbside]

Here’s the DM article about the sit down between the Wales and the Sussexes.

So, I take this as Meghan not realizing that she had inadvertently insulted Kate. When she realize Kate and she didn't view the conversation in the same way, she apologized.

No idea why William piled on at that point.

 

[Lilyflo]

He describes arriving at their Kensington Palace flat and said that Meghan’s mouth was open because of the décor, priceless art on the walls, books and furniture, saying ‘Wow’ repeatedly. Harry said that they had been thinking to themselves that their neighbouring flat had Ikea lamps and furniture ‘we'd recently bought on sale with Meg's credit card on sofa.com.’

They then sat down for a cup of tea and some biscuits where they asked after the Wales’ children, and they in turn they had asked about the Sussexes’ honeymoon.

If this is correct then Meghan hadn't visited W & C's KP flat until after her honeymoon. Surely she'd have been invited there before that?

 

[Royalist.in.NC]

Or, another way of looking at it, if William hadn’t lost his temper and knocked Harry to the floor after maligning his wife, then Harry wouldn’t have been able to report such a thing and the children wouldn’t be discussing it. I doubt they are anyway.

I will have to respectfully disagree. As an elementary school counselor in the US, I have witnessed and had reported to me vicious comments that children made and had obviously heard from an adult - most likely a parent. I had two boys (different years) but both in 4th grade at the time - 9 yrs which I believe is George’s age. Both boys’ mothers were killed - one in a motorcycle accident and one in a double murder suicide. You would not believe some of the horrific things other children said to them about their mothers. It will affect George, Charlotte, as well as the other young cousins in the wider RF who will no doubt hear about it at school or overhear their parents talking about it.

 

[tihkon2]

I'm sorry but the bridesmaid dresses and finger point are nothing compared to Harry's rambling about teen sex and his and William's penises. His supporters don't have anything to say about that?

 

[TLLK]

I will have to respectfully disagree. As an elementary school counselor in the US, I have witnessed and had reported to me vicious comments that children made and had obviously heard from an adult - most likely a parent. I had two boys (different years) but both in 4th grade at the time - 9 yrs which I believe is George’s age. Both boys’ mothers were killed - one in a motorcycle accident and one in a double murder suicide. You would not believe some of the horrific things other children said to them about their mothers. It will affect George, Charlotte, as well as the other young cousins in the wider RF who will no doubt hear about it at school or overhear their parents talking about it.

As an elementary school teacher sadly I have encountered similar situations regarding students' personal lives especially when if was on the local news. These stories have gone global.

 

[ppetrica]

Both Harry and Meghan have so far said so many things that later turned out to be false, that I wouldn't be surprised at all if eventually the same comes out about these 2 arguments.
From day one they know that none of the royals will comment on anything, as long as there were no other witnesses.

 

[crm2317]

How can Harry come out with such personal and private information about his family that he knows full well will make them upset and angry but then also claim that the ball is in their court? I wouldn’t want him or his wife in the same room as me ever again.

 

[FigTree]

I will have to respectfully disagree. As an elementary school counselor in the US, I have witnessed and had reported to me vicious comments that children made and had obviously heard from an adult - most likely a parent. I had two boys (different years) but both in 4th grade at the time - 9 yrs which I believe is George’s age. Both boys’ mothers were killed - one in a motorcycle accident and one in a double murder suicide. You would not believe some of the horrific things other children said to them about their mothers. It will affect George, Charlotte, as well as the other young cousins in the wider RF who will no doubt hear about it at school or overhear their parents talking about it.

Oh as someone who works with kids, lack of empathy is astounding. I had one turn to another after the recent death of her brother, in a fight, and go ‘well your brothers dead so there.’ I just don’t think they have any emotional understanding. Curiously some of the ones with ASD and ADHD can have so much empathy it hurts them.

 

[kimebear]

It's quite normal for newlyweds to start out by having a relatively modest IKEA home.
While people who have been married a number of years have had time to get some good furnitures and build up a style of their own - sometimes they even have a good taste.

Very true. William and Catherine started out their life together at Nott Cott as well before waiting for some time for their apartment at Kensington Palace to be ready for move-in. By the time of this visit, they had been married quite a few years and had the time to curate the grand appearance of their home. It didn't happen on Day 1.

 

[Curbside]

It always confused me that Pippa wore such a form fitting, slinky dress, it didn't chime at all with what Kate and the smaller bridesmaids wore. It was a nice dress but it looked like she'd stumbled into the wrong event. Anyway, I agree that Meghan and her bridesmaids dresses were a bit of a shambles. However, it WAS Meghan's wedding so all of the main decisions were hers to make no matter what Kate or the rest of us thought .Also it's not as though ill cut dresses and not wearing tights was a scandal it just wasn't a very pretty look. If Kate did make a tremendous fuss about not liking it then I'd have to say she was wrong as it wasn't her wedding and she should have quietly respected the bride's decisions. As I mentioned already, I thought that Pippa's dress was also a bad choice but that was up to Kate just as Meghan's choices were up to her.

I wasn't a fan of Pippa's dress, but it seems like it was copied over and over as a wedding dress. Pretty sure one or two sewing pattern companies offered knock-off at the time.

 

[FigTree]

How can Harry come out with such personal and private information about his family that he knows full well will make them upset and angry but then also claim that the ball is in their court? I wouldn’t want him or his wife in the same room as me ever again.

He obviously wants a good deal. Prominence and that. Why else would they have to talk about it. Do you discuss an invite to a friends wedding or do you just show up. They are obviously thinking on their role.

 

[Curbside]

I'm sorry but the bridesmaid dresses and finger point are nothing compared to Harry's rambling about teen sex and his and William's penises. His supporters don't have anything to say about that?

I thought these passages were pretty funny. Full disclosure, I'm a romance author. Those passages were pretty tame compared to things I've written and that some of my author friends have written.

 

[Alison H]

And how can he claim that he wants privacy and then disclose some extremely intimate personal information? I honestly can't decide whether he's doing it for the money or whether it's all out of spite.

 

[HRHHermione]

I thought these passages were pretty funny. Full disclosure, I'm a romance author. Those passages were pretty tame compared to things I've written and that some of my author friends have written.

I’m a huge romance reader. There’s a reason that fiction is usually written differently than one’s autobiography.

 

[Biset]

I thought these passages were pretty funny. Full disclosure, I'm a romance author. Those passages were pretty tame compared to things I've written and that some of my author friends have written.

You think it was funny that he disclosed private things about his brother without his consent?

 

[Muhler]

I thought these passages were pretty funny. Full disclosure, I'm a romance author. Those passages were pretty tame compared to things I've written and that some of my author friends have written.

Alas, Harry and William are not fictional figures.

It's also very tame to some of the stories and jokes I can tell, but they are also about fictional persons. And if they aren't, I don't write a book or go on TV naming them.

 

[tihkon2]

You think it was funny that he disclosed private things about his brother without his consent?

Exactly. This is completely beyond the pale. There should be no reason on God's green earth that I know if Prince William is circumcised or not. And now, thanks to his brother, I do.

 

[sophie25]

How can Harry come out with such personal and private information about his family that he knows full well will make them upset and angry but then also claim that the ball is in their court? I wouldn’t want him or his wife in the same room as me ever again.

Because he believes his family were feeding disparaging stories about him and his wife to the media before he left. I'm not in any camp here but that's why he said he did it and I don't think either side are wholly innocent in this saga.