One of the best things I read in a book recently referred to a civil war within a country. A teenager, raised outside the country, asks her visiting relative why it happened and to tell them everything. The response: I don’t know everything, I know somethings, fragments of the story. Life isn’t a novel.
If I was to use two words I would say: Expectations: Unmet, unrealistic, too high, misunderstood. And also an inability to play the long game. A snowball that continued to grow. But these things are deep and complex. When one thing in life goes wrong, all the buckets start to crumble. Our sanity, our equilibrium, our ability to keep the show moving is a finely balanced and vulnerable thing. I am in a public facing job and recently replaced someone who was much loved by the public they serve (due to internal conflicts), I just had to grin and bare the fact in their eyes I wasn’t them and therefore not good enough. The advice to me was you can only be who you are and you need to play long. You won’t win everyone. Same thing happened to a guy who once replaced me when I moved on. People didn’t like the changes and there was a year or two of not being well received.
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