Hmmmm. Not sure I believe that. What's she going to write?
Monday.
Had a chat with Anne on the phone, she says her bunion's killing her and could I pick her up some Dr Scholl insoles in Morrisons. Watched a bit of telly with Phil but we had an argument over 'Ready, Steady, Cook' and he went off to shoot something. Must remember to pick up some Mr Sheen for the tiara.
Tuesday.
Did a bit of waving in a hat. Pie and Mash for dinner.
Wednesday.
Edward sat us down tonight and told us he had something to tell the family but we had to cut him short 'cos Corrie was on. Still, he seemed happy with the Boyzone album we got him at Virgin Megastores. I didn't go in, I popped into Littlewoods for a cup of tea and a bun and Camilla bought Boyzone and a copy of "Dr Dray" for William. Had a bath, did the ironing and went to bed.
Thursday.
Did a bit more waving and then Gordon popped round for an hour. Apparantly he's inviting the King of Sweden over which'll be nice 'cos he owes me a fiver and Silvia can bring back that coat she borrowed last time she was here. I told her to give it to one of the kids at a foreign do but as yet, I haven't seen it. Phil said to buy a new one at the market on Saturday but it's the principle. "How Clean is Your House?" then bed.
Friday
Charles and Camilla came round in the morning but had to go early 'cos they were unveiling something or other and then Edward came over in the afternoon saying he really did need to tell us something but what with Rolf Harris pestering me for another picture I didn't have time to listen. Anne popped over though and kept him amused - he wants to borrow her wedding dress for a party. Must be fancy dress.
Saturday.
Went to the market. Got a new coat. Turns out Silvia lent it to Queen Margrethe and it's got burn holes in it. Me and Phil had that new steak and kidney pie from Marksies. Only 3 minutes in the microwave and you wouldn't know. We were only home five minutes and the bulb in the ballroom went so we had to get the ladder. Phil was swearing like a trooper but we got it done and had a game of twister with Beatrice and Eugenie. Edward phoned and said he'd really actually quite like to tell me something but what with all this hat choosing I'm snowed under. Alexandra's coming over tomorrow to do me hair so that'll be nice. Bed at 10.
Sunday.
Church this morning. Vicar pissed again. Oh well, I gave him a fiver so that's the pools sorted for the week. Alexandra came over and gave me hair a colour and did the home perm so I'll be ready for tomorrow. Phoned Edward but he said he couldnt chat 'cos he was off to a Shirley Bassey concert. He does like his music that boy. Sophie came round in the afternoon so I missed 'Songs of Praise' but little Louise had a whale of a time with that new Fisher Price Army Barracks we bought her. Had lamb for dinner and stone me, I'd forgotten to buy mint sauce. Phil went mad. Beatrix phoned - she's just bought a George Foreman grill and she's not sure if you can do fish fingers on it. I told her I'd ask Zara to pop over in the week and show her how to do it. Watched a programme about me on Channel 4 and went to bed.