The biography of Willem III by D. van der Meulen, page 96-98:
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Although she could not write about it, Sophie's memories about Berlin were filled with bitterness. Because beside Willem, she also met Wilhelm, the Duke von Braunschweig. However Sophie had never met him before, she had heard so many good things about him that she -for herself- started to make wedding plans. Due to circumstances nothing lead to it and now suddenly a Dutch cousin had entered her life, with an official proposal ánd prospects on a throne. Her dream-Duke was really handsome and utterly charming. When they met, Sophie dropped her glove and with a most fluent move the Duke picked her glove, while keeping eye-contact with her. For years Sophie would keep that glove with her. (It is still in the Royal House Archives in The Hague, with a hand-written note by Sophie).
The Duke accompagnied Sophie to her carriage and she was "excited and happy". The next days however, she barely recognized him: he acted distantly and tried to avoid her. In the meantime Sophie's father, King Wilhelm I von Württemberg, urged her daughter to give clarity and -speaking for himself- only one choice was possible. During a ball, Sophie was desperate about the sudden distant behaviour of Wilhelm von Braunschweig; in contrast the
Erbprinz von Oranien acted most friendly and courteous.
Sophie wrote in her memoirs: "After the ball I accompagnied my father to his appartments. There I announced to him that I had decided to marry the
Erbprinz." Wilhelm von Württemberg, moved to tears, informed her decision to the Prince of Orange and his son, the Hereditary Prince. *
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* = Source: Sophie von Württemberg,
l'Histoire de ma vie, page 86
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What is truth? From the letters of the Prince of Orange (the later King Willem II), written around the engagement, it seems that he and his son, the Hereditary Prince, were
not in Berlin when they were informed about Sophie's decision. They were informed, a month later, in Wiesbaden. The memoirs of Sophie, written 30 years later, seem not to match. This does not mean that Sophie's memoirs are not usable as historic source but it again learns the readers to be careful with the use of memoirs. When Sophie, already Queen of the Netherlands for many years, started to write her memoirs in 1865, a lot has happened which "coloured" her memories to those days in The Hague, Stuttgart, Berlin and Wiesbaden. She was married, already for more than 25 years. Like so many commemorative writings
l'Histoire de ma vie was largely written in a sort of self-defence ánd self-pity. Telling is Sophie's version of a conversation with her aunt Maria Pavlovna Grand-Duchess von Sachsen-Weimar und Eisenach born Grand-Duchess of Russia, after her decision to marry Willem:
"Oh, that is nice" said my aunt in a hurry, while looking outside through the window. When I did not respond, she turned around and looked to me. She saw my pale face, the remnants of my tears. "Dearest child, what is the matter?" she asked. "Oh", so escaped me: "I feel not the slightest trace of happiness". Aunt Maria Pavlovna stood before me, touched my shoulder with her white, chubby hand she was so proud of, and asked: "Do you have a right on happiness?" The bare idea that I could be happy! I was a Princess! That sort of people has no right on happiness. I kept silent and remained calm.*
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* = Source: Sophie von Württemberg,
l'Histoire de ma vie, page 90
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As a young Princess she had learned to cope with her destiny. That is what the Queen of the Netherlands tried to say with this. But this picture is misleading -undoubtedly not intended- because Sophie made the reader believe she had no any choice. But on this point the documents from 1838 and her memories in
l'Histoire de ma vie from 1865 agreed: it was she, Sophie and no one else, who made the decision, despite pressure from her father King Wilhelm I von Württemberg. With this she was in the same league as her contemporaries, like the British Princess Victoria. Of course, the most of them dare not to doubt the principle of
Ebenbürtigkeit but gone were the times that royal marriages only served dynastic interests and were made in the framework of political alliances. Of course, this sort of considerations remained - therefore the pressure by King Wilhelm I von Württemberg - but even in the highest royal circles, there was space for marriages in which personal feelings prevailed. Sophie could have refused. She did not. Seen from that viewpoint maybe it still was a
mariage de coeur but that seems far away seen the later developments in the marriage of Willem III and Sophie. In letters to his father, the Hereditary Prince of Orange firstly saw Sophie as someone "he could be seen with": she had a pretty appearance, a good posture, was intelligent and sensible.
Sophie's answer on the question why she agreed with the marriage remains unsatisfactory. If it was all true what she wrote, if she was not impressed by Prince Willem, if she felt "not the slightest trace of happiness", why did she not refuse? Her memoirs keep silent about what was also connected to the kingship - or in her case, the queenship: an immense wealth, the highest position in society, a great prestige, power even.
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